Insomnia again. It's 1am and I'm feeling so awake. Even when I feel tired I don't want to sleep, and when I wake up I don't want to get out of bed. I guess I just dont want to close my eyes and wake up to another depressing day.. Exactly like the morning you were leaving and the night after you left now I think about it. There's nothing to look forward to and the day after the next just gets darker and darker. Maybe it's dad being sick with no apparent sign of recovery, or that exams are around the corner and I'm worried I wont make it, or perhaps it's me still missing you and coping with you gone.. Either way I've lost the motivation to drive me forward, the reason to make me believe things will get better. You were always that bright star in the sky giving me hope, and without you I'm lost again.

Sighh life isn't fair, even you are surrounded by problems of your own, probably even more than me :( Still, I'm sure we'll get past this stressful period and in 3-4 weeks time, this would be a past memory with faded emotions. For now, we'll have to hang in there and stay strong, just as we always have.

Loving and missing you, more than you'll ever know.

Yours Always,
-NUT :)